River Jokes

Why is a river really rich?

Its got two banks.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What song did Russia send Ukraine for its birthday?

Crimea a river

What do you get if you cross a river with a bridge?

to the other side.

What is the river of negation called?

The Nile

Why did the Mexican throw his wife into the river?

Tequila

What river separates China and India?

Answer: the Fraser River (which separates Richmond and Surrey)

What did the sea say to the river?

You can run but you can't tide!

How did the elephant get out of the river?

Wet

Why did the man drowning in the river think he wasn't going to die?

He was in de-Nile.

What did the ocean say to the river?

You can run but you can't tide."

What was Roe v. Wade really about?

The fastest way to get across a river.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What do u call two lesbians floating down a river in a canoe?

Fur traders.

What do you call two lesbians floating down a river in a canoe?

Fur traders.

How can you tell if you're in Detroit or across the river in Windsor Ontario Canada?

Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada

What did the river say when it saw the beavers?

I'll be dammed.

Why was drug addicted Moses upset when he was floating down a river?

because he was in Da-Nile

What did the electrician say while swimming across a river?

Oh my God, that's a lot of current!"

Why wasn't the fella able to get out when he fell in the river?

Cause it was on a Sunday and the banks were closed

How do you spell Mississippi?

Redneck: Which one The river or the state

Where does a river keep it's money?

At the bank.

What do you call 4 Mexicans trying to cross a river?

Quatro-cinco

Why do elephants jump across rivers?

So they won't step on the fish.

What do you call a river that's an actor?

Russell Flow

What do beavers do to a river?

God dam it

What fish goes up the river at 100mph ?

A motor pike !

Why did the hummer cross the river?

For the insurance money.

How do I get to the other side of the river?

The blonde yells back "You are on the other side!"

What do you call paddling down a river of skim milk?

white water rafting.

What did the ocean said to the river when they parted ways ?

Nothing, he was just full of tears

What's grey stands in a river when it rains and doesn't get wet ?

An elephant with an umbrella !

What am I gonna do with a river?

Could you cry me a beer

What has a mouth but no teeth?

A: A river.

Why don't hipsters like rivers?

Too mainstream

You might also enjoy:

Birthday Jokes More Birthday Jokes

What did Patrick Stewart say when he was given a tortoise for his birthday?

Please, take it back. I don't like getting attached to animals. Especially when they only live 100 years.

What did the janitor get for his birthday?

A urinal cake.

Bank Jokes More Bank Jokes

Why is it a good idea to put your money in the freezer, instead of the bank?

So you always have access to cold hard cash...

Why did I rob the bank?

For Fundsies! I made that one up yesterday so I really hope nobody has heard it before.

Amazon Jokes More Amazon Jokes

What do mathematicians use to get fast delivery?

Amazon'

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do French people say when they don't want to see someone ever again?

Au nevoir.

Why did the chicken go to KFC?

A: He wanted to see a chicken strip.

Sail Jokes More Sail Jokes

Why Was The Canvas Maker Late Home From Work?

He had to close a sail

When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat?

When there's a sail on it.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why didn't John die?

John is a bird.

What happens when the Pope dies?

another one popes up.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why did the cannibal live on his own?

He was fed up with other people.

How can you know that you are insecure about what other people think of your post?

deleted

Surrey Jokes More Surrey Jokes

What's the difference between a Surrey girl and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in a washing machine it doesn't text you every hour for a week.

Where's the best place to apologise to someone?

Surrey.