Fence Jokes

Why aren't Tumblr users good farm contractors?

Because they always take a fence

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Why did the grave keeper build a fence around the grave yard?

Cuz everyone was dying to get in.

Why are most cemeteries fenced in?

Because everyone is dying to get in

Why do cemeteries have fences?

Because people are dying to get in.

How do you greet the cold horse across the fence?

Howdy Neigh - Brr Made up by my 4 year old son.

What do white people and fences have in common?

They both get jumped by Mexicans.

How many babies does it take to paint a fence?

Depends how hard you throw them

Why do Redditors get excited when a tornado rips down miles of fences?

Because there is a lot of reposting to do.

What's the difference between a refugee and a terrorist?

I don't know. I just build the fence.

How do lumber theives offload their stolen goods?

They fence it.

Why are there fences around graveyards/cemeteries?

Because people are dying to get in!

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How is Reddit like fencing?

Ripostes everywhere.

Why do you put a fence around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!

Why do they put fences around graveyards?

Because people are dying to get in.

What's brown and runs around your garden?

Your fence.

What do you call the removal of a fence?

Defence

Why aren't Mexicans ever indecisive?

Because if they're on the fence too long they get caught.

Why does no one want to work in the yard with a carpenter?

Because they take a fence to that.

Why do they have fences around cemetaries?

Because people are dying to get in.

Why are there fences around cemeteries?

people are dying to get in.

Why does Reddit hate Fencing?

Ripostes

What are the two biggest lies in Wyoming?

My truck is paid for, and honestly officer, I was just helping the sheep over the fence.

Why do they build fences around graveyards?

Because people are dying to get in

Why is there a fence around the graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!

What's the difference between one yard and two yards?

A: A fence.

When it's a legal matter, it's pronounced o-FENCE. When it's sports, it's pronounced OFF-ence. Climbing... ?

A fence.

Why do they have fences around a cemetery?

Because people are dying to get in.

What are the three biggest lies an Oklahoma State fan tells?

I WON this belt buckle, I OWN that truck, and I swear to God I was just helping that sheep over the fence.

What's the difference between a fence and a wall?

I give them a wall, and they take offense.

Why do cemeteries have fences around them?

Because people are dying to get in.

Why do they put fences around cemeteries?

People are dying to get in.

What happens when a Cow tries to jump over a fence?

Udder destruction

What do you call an Asian lady sitting on a fence with no arms or legs?

Pai-Ling

Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!

What kind of fence goes on strike?

A picket fence.

Why are Redditors so good at fencing?

Because they always riposte.

Why do graveyards have fences?

Cause everyone's dying to get in!

What time zone are you in when you find a sheep stuck in a fence?

Mountin' time

What time is it when the elephant sits on the fence?

Time to get a new fence...

Why did the Redditors like when a tornado hit a fence?

There was a lot of reposting to do

Why does the graveyard have fences?

Because people were dying to get in!

How big do you suppose that fence is?

I reckon that fence is around a yard."

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What do you do when a Chemistry teacher dies ?

Barium

What do you call a hundred year old man who dies in the library?

Overdue

Strike Jokes More Strike Jokes

What do they call Counter-Strike in the Middle East?

Tuesday.

Why did the chicken get a strike?

Because it was a fowl.

Reposte Jokes More Reposte Jokes

What do you call a none in a wheelchair?

Virgin Mobile I'm not sorry (PS, if this is a repost, I'm sorry that I didn't see the first time it got posted 2 years ago. Please don't accuse me of reposting)

What did the Ceasar of reddit say?

I came, I upvoted, I reposted.

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person who plays the viola?

A: A violator.

Who wouldn't let the gorilla in the ballet?

Just... the person responsible for making those decisions...

Property Jokes More Property Jokes

Why did Bill Nye crash his car?

Because inertia is a property of matter.

How do you keep brown bears off your property?

Build a wall

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

What dog can jump higher than a building?

Anydog, buildings can't jump!

Why is a cow that he jumps?

Because he higher and higher. (I translated the joke from Dutch, and yeah it's supposed to not make any sense, it just sounds funny, in Dutch at least. :-$)

Barb Wire Fence Jokes More Barb Wire Fence Jokes

What happened to the cow when she tried to jump over the barbed wire fence?

Udder destruction.

What do you get when a cow jumps over a barbed-wire fence?

Udder destruction!

Yard Jokes More Yard Jokes

When young Clark Kent was wearing a cape in the yard, who was he pretending to be?

Liberace

How do you keep a dog from barking in your front yard?

Put him in your back yard.