Kind Jokes

What kind of bagel can fly?

A plain bagel.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What kind of car does a rich baker drive?

A Rolls-Royce.

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock

What kind of cologne applies itself?

Elon Musk

What kind of shoes do thieves wear?

Sneakers.

What kind of beer was Dr. Stephen Strange serving?

It was his own Strange Brew. You would be Moranic not to like it.

What kind of dog doesnt bark?

A hot dog

What kind of car does a cat drive?

A Cadillac.

What kind of tree is a must?

An obliga-tree.

What kind of street to ghosts, goblins and ghouls live on?

A Dead End.

What does a college kid do when confronted by an evil spirit?

He drinks it just like he drinks every other kind of spirit.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What kind of jokes does a zombie make?

Dad jokes.

What kind of yoga do you do in a casket?

Decom-pose.

What kind of gum do bees chew?

BUMBLEGUM. Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.

What kind of plants grow in bathrooms?

Toilet trees.

What kind of TB do potatoes get?

culosis.

What kind of math can you do with light?

Refractions

What kind of Ant lives in rented accommodation?

Tenants.

What kind of girls date firefighters?

Hose.

What kind of fish can you find in a hospital?

A sturgeon.

What kind of music do wind turbines listen to?

They're huge metal fans.

What kind of music venues do gun lovers like the most?

Carry OK

What do you call the belief that one kind of shoe is better than another?

Shoepremacy.

What kind of gardening is done in the hood?

Weeding

What kind of shrimp does Chris Brown like?

Battered shrimp.

What kind of mic did Kurt Cobain use?

A shotgun mic!

What kind of ideas do blind people get?

Brailleant ones. Sauce: Am blind.

What kind of knots only exist in space?

Astro-knots.

What kind of wine causes the most accidents?

Shartonnay

What kind of animal can record video?

A cam-el. Get it, because a camera records things and a camel is a animal.

What kind of room doesn't have any doors/windows inside?

A mushroom.

What kind of pants does Mario wear?

Denim Denim. Denim

What kind of sick bird is against the law?

an ill eagle

What kind of cheese is made backwards?

Edam.

What kind of tree has the best bark?

A dogwood

What kind of database does a Pokdex use?

PokMongoDB

What kind of bug bites only at your feet?

Mosqui-toes

What kind of movies do scurvy circles enjoy?

rated movies.

What kind of dog suffers most from being inbred?

A hot dog

What kind of superhero would Caitlyn Jenner be?

An Ex-Man.

What kind of newspaper do cows read?

The Moo York Times

What kind of tea do koalas drink?

Euca-lipton

What kind of church music do they sing in Finland?

FINNISH HYMN!

What kind of cars do jedis drive?

A toy-

What kind of drug is /r/theRedPill?

It's a beta blocker

What kind of cheese can be used to build a structure?

Cottage cheese.

What kind of farm has lots of books but no livestock?

Barns and no-bulls. (This joke was made up by my 7 year-old cousin.)

What kind of dog should you get a spanish speaker?

A spaniel.

What kind of bird does not make babies?

A swallow

What kind of tree likes a high five?

A palm tree

What kind of car does Jesus drive?

A Christler.

What kind of bat hangs upside-down?

An acrobat.

What kind of wolf never runs?

Steppenwolf

What kind of cancer always stands by the government?

Pro-state cancer.

What kind of car does Yoda drive?

A Toy-Yoda

What kind of fun do priests have?

Nun

What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted?

Make it Tso's Number One."

What kind of exercise did Jesus do?

Crossfit

What kind of suit does a lawyer like best?

The Spanish Inquisition.

What kind of cheese gives out money?

Prova I just came up with that and feel pretty proud (:

What kind of underwear does a person wear when buried?

Fruit of the tomb

What kind of bear is best?

One that gets you an oscar

What kind of degree do you inherit through marriage?

A degree in law.

What kind of bees get you high?

Doo-bees... I'm so sorry for that

Why do rabbits prefer IPA's over other kinds of beers?

Because they use extra hops

What kind of vision does Fetty Wap have?

17/38

What kind of joke do peeping Toms like?

In-ya-window

What kind of computer can also sing?

A Dell.

What kind of operating system do horses use?

None. Horses are not known to use operating systems nor computers for that matter.

What kind of a battery does Dj Khaled use?

A Li-ion battery.

What kind of eel is this?

Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?" Waiter: "Do you love it?" Diner: "yeah" Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"

What kind of trophy do I get every time I lift weights?

Hypertrophy!

What kind of car does Bill Cosby drive?

A Honda quaalude. (Credit to my girlfriend)

What kind of wood doesn't float?

Natalie Wood.

What kind of music did Jesus hate?

Anything by Judas Priest and Nine Inch Nails.

What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice?

Neck-romance-y.

What kind of Aircraft is into Men and Women?

A Biplane.

What kind of condoms do frogs wear?

Rib-bed

What kind of cheese would you use to disguise a small horse?

Mascarpone

What kind of food can you color with?

A cranberry! Esher (my Grandson) age 5

What kind of overalls does Mario wear?

Denim, denim, denim.

What kind of pizza would the twin towers order?

Two plains.

What kind of music does a pirate like?

Arrr'n'B

What kind of shoes does Jack Lew wear?

Cashews.

What kind of pizzas can tell the future?

Medium Pizzas

What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

sneakers( iknow its old but its nice)

What kind of music do balloons hate the most?

Pop music.

What kind of doctor never leaves the hospital?

An Oncologist

What kind of shoes do bears wear?

None because they go barefoot.

What kind of dog does Sauron have?

A La-Barad-dr

What kind of cake did Noah enjoy?

Mabul cake.

What kind of computer can't sing?

A Dell

What kind of fish is made of two sodium atoms?

2 Na!

What kind of fish is made of only two sodium molecules?

2 na

What kind of drink does a ghetto drinks?

A GHETTOrade

What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow ?

Reality. I'll show myself out now...

What kind of medicine do you give a kid having a fit?

An anti-hissy-tamine.

What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?

Spring water

What kind of coffee do the Islamists hate the most ?

French press

What kind of cuisine did the rude Jamaican serve?

Caribbean Jerk. Ayyyyy!

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What has six legs two arms four eyes and a tail?

A man holding an aardvark.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef!

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What did one flea say to the other after a night out ?

Shall we walk home or take a dog

What does Harry Potter say when he walks into a bar?

I Expectsum Patronum

Sushi Restaurant Jokes More Sushi Restaurant Jokes

What kind of eel is this?

Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?" Waiter: "Do you love it?" Diner: "yeah" Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"

What did the fish say for stinking up the sushi restaurant?

I am saury.

Toilet Paper Jokes More Toilet Paper Jokes

What is a math teacher's favorite kind of toilet paper?

The kind that has multi ply's.

What do you get when an alternative metal band runs out of toilet paper?

Rage Upon the Latrine

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why did the stutterer get shot in the ghetto?

He was asking for directions for the "k-k-k-mart."

How many black people are needed to change a light bulb?

One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.

Cruise Jokes More Cruise Jokes

What's a barber's favourite kind of holiday?

Cruising on a clipper.

Why did Katie Holmes get rid of her fancy car?

She got tired of all that Cruise control.

Tom Jokes More Tom Jokes

What kind of joke do peeping Toms like?

In-ya-window

What do you call a peeping Tom cat?

A Purrr-vert.

Waiter Jokes More Waiter Jokes

What are those?

The waiter says "Some are suger, Summersalt"

What did the Australian Chess player say to the waiter?

Cheque, mate!