I don't know. Torqu?
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Coffee Mug
I work in a casino and want to hear your best one. Here is mine: what's the difference between a canoe and a baccarat player? A canoe sometimes tips!
Having all that trivial information must be a big distraction...
They're obsessed with rigid bodies!
Because they work for peanuts
early retirement
Cause they work out.
Because...bros before hose!
Because they always double Czech their work!
To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd.
On a jpeg.
Couple's Daily Question Mug
Well, it worked with the slaves.
He was on crystal math.
Slap her.
I give tours at a zoo. Each tour goes for a couple of hours so it is good to engage the guests and make the tour a bit more fun. What is your favourite animal joke I can use at work?
So he could go to Otter Space.
A Pauperazzi
Katie Keurig. (I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)
Because 0x0 is always 0.
She just wasn't working out.
No strings attached
Decaf Coffee
He had to close a sail
I was thinking black, but I'm not sure it would work?
Fireunemployed.
He ate his pizza before it was cool. (Written anonymously in the bathroom at work, a pizza joint.)
In the kitchen.
Why do cow wear bells .......???? Because their don't work :D :P
A quadriplegic chimney sweep.
they have too many ohms to be good conductors.
Because 7 ate 9. Credit to a guy I work with.
Suture self!
Because it was ly ill. I'll show myself out.
They know how to work under the hood!
The lightbulb works fine...
A quarter-pounder with cheese.
I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done
Baltimore, I hear it's backbreaking work.
Ah-so-late!
slowing down his car. ... ... shoutout to for this one.
SQUAAATS! ...Polly want a cracker.
Kush ups
Two. One to cut and one to glue
Medicine.
Because its white and it works.
4:30pm It let's you out of work a bit early with a valid excuse
It ova slept.
Baghdad
Sure, you know how it works, but now it's dead.
Because they don't like to judge anyone.
He works them out with a pencil.
Re-tail.
He kneaded the doe. (Doesn't work too well in text)
Lawsuits.
A stick. I'll see myself out now.
well I'm glad I've gotten that cleared up
Private employee starts work checking email. Public official starts works making a coffee.
Because they knead dough.
Cause they're white
He had to parrot.
He thought nothing could possibly travel faster than sea.
Because you already know she'll work out.
He had swine flu
Take off the chain and both stop working. Going straight to hell :)
A Terrista
Everyone knows black people can't work a full week.
None. They aren't about to change a bulb when flipping a switch has worked for 15 years.
He was expecting showers.
Hnng. Aaaaaaaah. Like that. I'll show myself the door.
Her husband on a date.
A working stiff
One of those greasy bums is making a lot more money.
9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)
A faux-cet.
They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)
It has huge balls on it. Credit goes to the 70 year old man who just came into my work and made my day.
It only takes one, but we weren't able to get the work done in 1 term because we inherited a really bad situation from the prior administration.
Because it can't be taken on empty stomach
This is a joke I came up with. Q: How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb? A: There's no need to change it when you can easily convince everyone that it still works, but they've gone blind.
Paddy Hor D'oeuvre
He was stoned
They work it out with a pencil.
fiiish. (works when spoken :-/)
They don't work.
A futility knife.
an heir conditioner.
So it could hide in the strawberry patch.... Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? No? See, it worked!
They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.
I am working on a project, and its going to revolve around a phrase. I need it to be really out there, yet could be used in everyday life. But honestly just give me anything you got.
Because they take a fence to that.
He was having a coffin fit!
Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...
The Internship
Because she refused to work in a mail dominated industry.
Sha-neigh-neigh. Thought of it at work.
He wanted to finally get respecced.
Cashearing! (Joke I made up last night at work, so be gentle with me)
Mandel broth Ha ha ha The puns I make up while working as a grocery cashier..
He missed Debussy. I'll just leave.
A statistician.
A good days hunting.
Not all men.
A man was telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect.' 'Really,' answered the neighbor. 'What kind is it?' 'Twelve thirty.'
When the terrorists asked for anything cheaper than one-way.
The banana gets in the way. Banana split
My erection.
It only takes two mice to screw in a light bulb. The hard part is getting them in there.
Get out of my son!"
Arman.
Get off me homes.
He had a loco motive.
An HTC One M8.
WATAAAAAR
Because attachments are forbidden
Because of their Crystal Balls EDIT: I'm not sure if anyone's posted this before my mum's sister emailed her from across the globe.(New Zealand) I laughed so hard I thought I'd put it here. Credit goes to my Mum's sister though.
