So the other day I'm talking to a friend about what happened to the Energizer Bunny. It's been quite sometime since I've seen him appear in a commercial. I was always under the impression that he "kept going." My friend proceeds to tell me the Energizer Bunny was arrested last year ,and they charged him with battery. Now it all makes sense.
Couple's Daily Question Mug
Coffee Mug
A: Because it's Syria's business. (cross-post from by request)
100. 1 to actually clean the shower, and 99 to stand around and talk about how filthy it is.
100. One to actually clean it, and 99 to talk about how dirty it is.
A spelling bee. Credit goes to a cheesestick wrapper!
Stephen Talking.
One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own.
Nothing,pipes can't talk. Thank you
They look at your feet instead of theirs.
At the circus, the clowns don't talk.
A clock! One provides the tic, the other provides the talk Credit to my Autistic Big Bro
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Swine language
It's a sore subject.
Coink! Coink!
Disney spells.
By long distance.
He's the one staring at YOUR feet when he talks
When talking to you, the extrovert mathematician looks at *your* shoes.
A last name, you pervs.
They keep talking about their nitrates
They trash talk.
The Holocaust.
A spelling bee!
Wife: That's how she talks. Apparently she speaks fluent pterodactyl.
because they've got a lot on their mind.
Police: Police. Me:What do u want Police: To talk. Me: How many r u Police: 2 Me: Talk to each other.
3. One to change the bulb and two to talk about how beautiful the turns were.
By 'elephone !
A bird that talks in morse code !
They seem mad..." -Temp worker at Foot Locker
Nick: I don't know. Tom: Nothing. Bananas can't talk.
It is a breeze
When you talk to a bad girl, ask 'How much are you '
If it's a good one you will be able to talk about it later!
In my excitement, I asked my girlfriend "How's your daddy " instead of "Who's your daddy " and now five hours later we're still talking about his diabetes...
That's a goat!" He says "I wasn't talking to you."
He didn't have all the 7" he kept talking about.
me stops jumping: You would have said no
I said, "well, you are in a wheelchair".
Send him to polytechnic !
They don't. They just talk about when it did work.
Me: Shhh! This is my fantasy & burritos don't talk.
Like if you're talking about them, you aren't having a rough enough time already.
Wet
The Talking Heads
Me: mmm, talk to me in an accent. H: Zoinks, like, there's a ghost! Let's get out of here Scoob! M: *swoons*
Ask the oldest one to speak first.
Woman: "How DARE you call my dog that!" Man: "I was talking to the dog!"
Nothing stupid, dogs don't talk.
Me: Before I tell you let's talk about ending sentences with prepositions.
God: *sigh* Fine. Mouths. But they'll talk. A lot.
I would never do that. It's the worst.
Baron mind who you're talking to !
Popular
An extroverted Techie looks at *your* shoes when he's talking to you.
Force-kin My friend made this up today while talking about Star Wars.
A: An animal that talks your head off.
Because money talks.
On the phone. It's a baby. If I wanted to hear random noises when I talk, I have a husband for that.
A: Well first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
Ha, you really think rocks can talk
They always talk about how they're from New York.
When you're talking about choices.
Because talk is cheep !
Me:I wouldn't know... I don't talk to him about you...
Because he's always talking trash.
Aries a reason why I talk this way !
Me: It doesn't talk. Cashier: Ya, but what does it say Me: IT DOESN'T TALK. Cashier: Ok, Ma'am.
Because they're all dead.
Don't talk with someone in your mouth.
A moo'd specialist.
Do you see me in the kitchen discussing dishwashing strategies No. You don't.
Guess I can't see what everyone else sees.
None. They'll just stand in the dark talking about how good the old one was.
You discussed me.
It was a CommonTater I just made this up I swear
Banana. .. What did the cow say to the banana Banana. .. What did the goat say to the banana Baaah- nothing. Goats can't talk.
Nobody gave it a stern talking to.
Joint-Discussion
They can stick to the subject!
Who said talk is cheap "
One talks with their hands and makes goofy noises at random volumes, and the other can't hear.
The both have no idea why everyone stopped talking and just stared at her.
Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk
How do you hold her close to where you are" Me: Aren't most angels men
Because it doesn't have any hands.
All of my friends are now talking about how they have to catch Amal.
My wife is suffocating me -Literally or figuratively sir Well thats a stupid question. How would I be talking
Nothing -- apples don't talk!
Weirdos!!
I don't even wanna talk to the living.
It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife." Lady: "Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."
Incommunicado
then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again.
Me: My desires are..imagines having a talking Pug named Maurice that I watch Netflix with...Unconventional.
Her: Yep, and pillows don't talk. I think we're bonding.
She has been talking nonstop for the last two days.
You can actually get through the minefield alive.
a condescending con descending.
Husband: Because when I get round to the front I've forgotten what I was going to say
A: It would be tough to be an idiot all day long.
There are plenty there that are free. Just walk and you are bound to find at least 40. Idiot
Nein! Mein Stein!....sorry
Because they always try to maximize the degrees of freedom.
He heard the referees were blowing fouls... -Jim Norton
Me: I don't know Her: The green guy! Who lives in the red house? Me: The red guy Her: Yes! Who lives in the blue house? Me: The blue guy Her: Yeah! Who lives in the yellow house? Me: The yellow guy Her: Who lives in the white house? Now since I've heard this "riddle" before, I knew the trick answer. I was ready to answer The President! when my uncle blurted out: The black guy!!
Both hate when people stick beef between two buns.
A: To meet chicks.
Because he thought people were taking him for granite.
People in Dubai don't watch the Flinstones, but people in Abu Dhabi do.
There used to be exactly two, and now it's too offensive to talk about.
Throw it in the water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, it's buoyant
Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake.
Husband: I will go mad with grief. Wife (a bit glad): You wouldn't remarry, would you Husband: You never know. A mad man can do anything!
They're both leg ends.
Because if it were any longer it would be a foot!
